When I look at the comments by ‘outsiders’ regarding the current gender debate, I realise that many people do not really understand the gender critical point of view. This was me up until recently and has been written about by far better women, such as Sarah Ditum and Victoria Smith. You can probably tell that I am not a writer, but I hope that the rambling thoughts of a confused woman, written in the simplistic way my brain works, might help someone trying to make sense of the madness.
Because the T has been plopped onto the end of the LGB people automatically assume that if you support the latter then you must unequivocally support the former. Up until recently this has mostly been the case. People with body dysphoria, who wanted to present themselves in the stereotype of the opposite sex were supported and nurtured within the feminist community. They were our friends and still are. There were cross dressers who were openly hostile to women, especially lesbians, and we were warned about them by our transsexual friends.
So what changed? Well to put it simplistically the narrative shifted. Trans acceptance was changed to trans adherence. A hard line group of trans activists no longer wanted their chosen lifestyles to be accepted, free of abuse and violence, they now wanted people to state that they were not living as the opposite sex – they WERE the opposite sex. They wanted to claim womanhood for their own and any talk within the feminist community about biology was now deemed transphobic.
Suddenly ‘trans women are women’ became the mantra and the fear of showing any disagreement passed around silently until everyone became aware that dissent was toxic. How did this happen? How did we allow this ‘religion’ to spread, to the point where women are being interviewed by police for speaking out against it? Everyone I know in the real world is baffled and rightly so. I wonder how many casual trans supporters realise that 85% of trans identifying males do no physical transitioning at all? They want access to female spaces, with fully functioning penises, based purely on an inner feeling.
Radical feminism isn’t about equality of the sexes – its about tearing down the structures that prop up patriarchy, one of these being gender. Gender is the set of stereotypes attributed to the sexes and are used to oppress and subjugate women because of biology. Trans activists need gender to prosper because without stereotypes they have nothing. If clothes, make-up, jobs, etc. were all completely gender neutral then how would they declare themselves ‘women’? They will never be able to give birth, menstruate, breastfeed or any of the other wonderful things that the female body does. They will never be abused because of their biology in the way women are. Abuse towards trans identifying men is due to their non-conformity, not their biology. So it is not a surprise that any talk of biology is instantly deemed transphobic. We are talking about seriously ill men here who need constant validation and any glimmer of reality that permeates their fantasy causes them to feel rage, which is mostly aimed at women.
This need for validation is seeping into all aspects of the conversation or lack of. They phone up venues where the impact of the GRC on women is going to be discussed, they have physically attacked women, they are creeping into schools teaching under tens that they could be in the wrong body, they are using more and more Orwellian techniques to shut down debate. They say their identities are not up for debate and no one is saying they are. It is their insistence that no one acknowledges reality that is harming their cause and creating a chasm between themselves and women. A separate category for trans people is needed in politics and sport. Anyone who cannot see the reasons why – I’m sorry I cannot help you.
Feminism is about women, for women. We were always happy to support trans people but our fights are not mutually compatible. The only overlap in the Venn diagram is male violence, so why can’t we admit that we have different paths to march, and help each other out along the way?
There are dark undertones pushing the trans activist agenda. The link between paedophile groups has come to light, which is hardly surprising. Stopping children reaching puberty must be a paedophile’s dream. Children will be the biggest victims and when it blows over and people start regaining their sanity the lawsuits will be huge. Lawyers must be rubbing their hands.
MRA groups within the Labour Party have come out from the cesspit they were hiding in. It must have killed them to pretend to support women’s rights for so long but now they can be openly misogynistic while pretending to be progressive. Saying they support trans rights without acknowledging the complexity of the situation is so easy for these dudes. They pop up in every thread, with their super-smug faces, talking absolutely bullshit about gender. They refuse to define what a woman is but they all know what they want when it comes to sex.
I used to be one of those women who believed that a female soul could be trapped in a man’s body. To be honest, I never really gave it much thought. Then one day I had a ‘light bulb’ moment and everything changed. I was following a conversation on Twitter and someone asked how a TIM knew what it felt like to be woman. Suddenly I realised that there was no way to feel like a woman – we just are. Every woman is different and to say that we all ‘feel’ the same is offensive in the extreme. The ONLY thing that makes us women is our biology – from the chromosomes to the vagina. These are the things that are used to socialise us with. Baby girls who are murdered are not killed because of some mystical identity. Abortion laws can not be bypassed by saying you have a male essence. No penis has ever peed on a pregnancy test with a sick feeling in the stomach of its owner.
Keeping sex as the centre of feminism is vital. Womanhood is not a club anyone can join. We need female only spaces. Rape victims need penis free places where they can feel safe. Abused women and children need sanctuaries to heal in. Women need places to discuss feminism away from male interruption or being told we must be ‘inclusive’. Thankfully the majority of trans people do understand this and are walking side by side with us during this battle. They have seen the ways women are discussed on trans forums and are genuinely concerned for our welfare. They are being harmed by this madness. All they want is to live their chosen life in peace and suddenly they find themselves being lumped in with fanatics. What was a fight to abolish gender has now become a minefield of doublespeak, gaslighting and misogyny. We need common sense politicians to be brave enough to steer it back on course and say that women’s rights must remain sex based, trans people must be protected in their own right and, most importantly, children must be protected from the worst elements of trans activism. Science not ideology.
Women should and must be allowed to control the language of feminism. If you call them ‘cis’ you are making them a subcategory within their own sex. They are not cis, uterus havers, non-men, menstruaters or any of the other ridiculous terms being used to avoid using the correct term.
The students trying to set up gender neutral toilets at their conference was a light moment in amongst all this madness. Being gender non-conforming is nothing new but they need it to feel special, bless them. They are young and stupid – I’m so relieved social media wasn’t around to record my idiocracy at that age. But young stupid ideologists shouldn’t be dictating policy. They are there to remind us how daft we used to be and nothing more.
I’m not sure I’m making sense. I wish I could plug my brain into the computer and let it download my thoughts and rearrange them into a coherent message. I’m grateful to anyone who takes the time to read and make sense of them.
I love hearing your comments. It’s great to feel less alone. Here’s to sanity being restored shortly. Cheers.